In All Their Glory
by Jan Monroe
Summary: This is a simple embarrassing story. It is based on Red Blaze's stories (War and Passion, Fire and Ice). Harry and Ron are the victims of a practical joke. Complete


This is a simple embarrassing story. It is based on Red Blaze's stories (War and Passion, Fire and Ice).

1. I would like to thank my beta reader, Donna, who attempted to find all of my mistakes. She deserves a medal. I wrote a remarkably clean dirty story.   
  
In All Their Glory

Spring, Fifth Year

Madam Headmore had taken over Divination. She believed that to accurately chart someone's star pattern for a specific short-term prediction, one had to observe the stars in comparison to those of the person's birth chart three hours before dawn. She had dragged everyone taking Divination to observe the stars at the unheard of hour of 3:30 am. Even those most devoted to Divination were not pleased.

Harry, Ron and Hermione started running at 5:30 and had progressed to physical conditioning. This is what the 5th, 6th and 7th year girls saw as they passed by the quidditch pitch, heading back to their dorms. The debate started as whispers.

Susan Bones was the first to loudly proclaim, "Ron has a better body than Harry. All those great big bulging muscles!"

Blaise Zabini countered, "Harry has a much cuter butt with really tight buns."

The debate raged until one of the Ravenclaws pointed out that they really needed to make a side-by-side comparison to be truly fair. Then the debate changed. How do they get them both naked in one place so an honest comparison could be made? It made sense that it should be while they were training. They were now in a dilemma. How to get them naked?

Hermione unwittingly provided the answer. She had left one of the special Defense Against the Dark Arts books on the table in the Gryffindor common room. Katie opened it to the index and found an interesting spell. It was really designed to make Medieval armor fall off a knight, but with a few modifications...well, she hoped with just a few...it could make the "binding" on their clothes give way. She hoped that meant that the seams would fall apart.

She quickly copied the spell down. Now to find someone that was good at Arithmancy to help modify the spell. They reasoned that it was not a dark arts spell, just a prank, so they shouldn't get into any trouble for it.

The night before the last moonlight Divination class, the spell was ready and so were the girls. They had experimented and found that the weakened spell they had created caused seams to disappear and the clothing to fall apart in approximately twenty to twenty five minutes. That meant the Blaise would have to sneak out of class about 15 minutes early to cast the spell so that the guys would be ready to lose their yummy black training clothes about 5 minutes after class. She got the honor of casting the spell because she was the only one that could get the spell to work each and every time she tried it.

After all, they couldn't have 60 girls lined up, vying for a better viewing position too early. Timing was essential!

The guys might think something was up. Ron wouldn't, he tended to ignore things that he didn't view as a threat. He was learning how to be aware of what he was doing and his environment at the same time but was still working on it. It was very difficult to keep track of everything. He knew that he had to learn how to do it, it would keep him alive in dangerous situations but developing it was difficult.   
Ron might even like the attention. 

Harry would notice. Everyone knew that he had a girlfriend, or at least a bed partner, but no one was talking. Of course, sleeping with Harry was something a girl would not brag about. The idea of being tortured was enough to keep any girl's lips sealed, but not enough to stop every one of them from fantasizing what he was like in bed. It hadn't keep a few from scheming how to get him into their beds, either. Ron slept around so much that the death eaters couldn't know which one was important, as secrecy was not an issue. Ginny had called sex Ron's drug of choice. It made him feel fantastic and forget about what had happened to him for a while.

The dawn was breaking as Blaise slowly crept into position to cast the spell. She got a clear shot at Harry first. It took a few more minutes to hit Ron. He was running on the inside of her position, blocked by Hermione and moving too fast for her to hit quickly without hitting Hermione. They were aiming for the guys, after all.

All she had to do now was wait. She thought back to the priori incantatum thing and did a few small charms from last night's homework to cover her wand's tracks and settled back to enjoy the show.  
Class had let out and the girls had hurried into position on the battlements overlooking the training field. The giggling and shushing was audible from the field but no one was bothered by it. The girls had done this at least twice that week while watching training.

Harry was the first to notice the problem with his clothing but he'd blamed Ron. At least that is what the girls thought from the action down on the pitch. Ron had grabbed Harry's shirt and it fell apart when Ron pulled up. He threw it on the ground and kept at the martial arts training. Harry stuck out his leg to overbalance Ron and make him fall. Ron wasn't the only thing that met the ground. Harry's pants did as well. Now all he had on were his shoes, socks, shorts and a belt with weapons hanging from it.

They were counting the seconds until the last of Harry's undergarments fell by the wayside. Just then, Ron's shirt also appeared to be coming apart. The girls admired the view as Harry's underwear fell and Ron lost his pants, revealing defined calves and quadriceps. He kept going, really thankful that his shorts were still in place. He rather liked not having a breeze. Ron disliked a breeze coming up his robes, no matter what that strange old wizard had said at the Quidditch world cup final. In Scotland, the breeze was just too cold!  
Hermione and their unknown trainer had noticed the unusual events. Actually, Ron had thrown the back of Harry's shirt at them. Hermione was appreciating the view almost as much as the girls in the tower. She worked out with these guys and had felt all those hard muscles as they developed but she had never actually saw them both in their full glory before this. Well, she had seen Ron but that was well before he had built up his body to such wonderful proportions.

Ron's back bunched and flexed as he attempted to over-balance Harry and throw him. Harry's biceps bulged as he executed the counter move that sent Ron sliding on the ground. As Ron slid, his shorts shredded leaving him lying on his back with his assets exposed. Ron blushed but jumped back to his feet and returned to his battle with Harry. Harry was up by one fall and Ron did not want to lose. Harry was going down. He should feel what it was like to slid his bare butt on the semi-frozen ground.

Daniels and Hermione had stopped to watch the Ron and Harry as they did their impression of early Greek Olympians, going at each other bare naked except for their shoes and weapons belts.

"Ron? Harry? What are you doing?" Hermione asked.

"Winning," Harry called back.

"Teaching Harry that stupid tricks will not slow me down," Ron yelled.

"I'm not the one that took the last fall," Harry commented.

"Daniels, are you going to play anymore of these distracting tricks?" Ron asked.

Daniels smiled and then started laughing, "I didn't do it. Maybe it was your admirers up there?"

Harry and Ron looked up and around. Then they saw them, the entire female contingent of the 5th, 6th and 7th years - the non-threat that they had ignored as they battled each other. It didn't seem to appear that they had realized that they had presented the girls with a full frontal view. The omnioculars were clicking away as the girls aimed and zoomed in for close-up views. A few of the girls were fiddling with the features, measuring all the important body parts for length and breadth, shoulders, thighs, biceps, and of course their other assets. Money exchanged hands as bets were paid off. 

Harry was the first to notice Blaise hiding under the Slytherin stands. Daniels followed Harry's glare to the girl attempting to escape. She belatedly realized that staying this close had not been her best idea.  
Daniels walked over to her but Hermione, Harry and Ron could not hear what he was saying. He turned and loudly called, "we're done for today. See you tomorrow."

He grabbed Blaise and started dragging her towards Dumbledore's office. He was protective of his charges and he disliked the idea that anyone would do this to them.

The guys gathered their equipment and scattered clothing before heading towards the castle. They had been so distracted by events, they hadn't reacted to their de-clothing yet. They had just passed the locker room when Hermione called to them.

"Aren't you going to at least grab a towel?" she asked from behind them.

Ron and Harry looked at each other, the reality of the situation finally dawning on them. Them...naked...girls watching... pictures... Hermione here! NOW! They both started blushing. Harry positioned his shredded clothing to cover himself. Ron was not that modest. He turned to face here head on.

Hermione couldn't stop herself from taking the pot shot at them, " It must be embarrassing." Only she didn't 

pronounce it correctly, she made it sound like 'Him bare ass ing'. If they didn't know better, Harry might have thought that she had enjoyed the view.

Ron smiled. He liked the way Hermione's eyes had appraised his body. He would have suggested a quickie if Harry hadn't been present. He made passes at her everyday but this situation was even too much for him. He's smile was magnified as she turned a bright pink. It matched his own reddening cheeks.

She broke the silence, and she hoped some of the sexual tension between she and Ron. "I think you better get something on. Think how thrilled McGonagall will be if you walk through the main hall in your current state!"  
Harry laughed now. "Heart attack or hot flash?"

"Both," Ron answered, but couldn't stop himself from adding, "I could use a little heat myself."

Hermione turned even redder as she watched him harden, just beaconing her to drag him into a deserted space and have her way with him.

Harry felt rather than saw the tension rise again quickly. He grabbed Ron's arm and dragged him into the locker room.

They found out later that day that Dumbledore had not been pleased at this invasion of Harry and Ron's privacy. Everyone involved got to serve 5 wonderful nights of detentions. They got to clean the castle muggle-style.

Much the Harry's and Ron's relief, all evidence of the event was destroyed. Even the very detailed notes kept by one Ravenclaw how had more accurate measurements than Madam Malkin. Why she needed to know exactly how long their penis' were and how low their testes hung in relationship to their feet size, they had no idea. They thought that she may have a foot fetish. All Ron knew is that he didn't want to date her!

The End.


End file.
